I was fifteen when I received my fist paycheck, and because I am my mother's daughter, I bought myself this sapphire pendant and ring set. It's been a staple of mine ever since. Well done fifteen year old Amber.
At the moment, it is a night. I won't say which night, because I am admittedly queuing up posts in case I have to make a mad dash for the birth of my niece. I am watching old videos from YouTubers that inspire me, and I am thinking. I am thinking a lot. The monthly or weekly summary vlogs are popping up more and more, and I do adore them. I miss making them as well, but I can only film myself sitting in my room and painting so many times. These people record their interesting lives and say poignant things, and I think about this blog, and what I'm doing with it.
I enjoy fashion and personal style, and I obviously enjoy my art, and I even enjoy playing around with beauty products from time to time. Am I the best around? No. But it's enjoyable and interesting, to me at least. This blog is meant to show off my abilities, as I've said before, but I'm just not sure how much of my voice/personality is in it. Writing has never been an easy task for me. I can come up with ideas and visuals no problem, but putting my thoughts and opinions into words is really stressful. So it's a good thing I blog, right?
I mean, I'm not about to get into politics or any kind of harshly debated topics. I definitely can't process those thoughts into words, but there are other topics and thought processes that float through my mind on a daily basis, but I haven't really shared before. I love this space, and it's not going anywhere, but for the sake of keeping things interesting, how personal is too personal? Is it too negative to go on about personal experiences with depression and anxiety, or thoughts about young adulthood stress factors? What about experiences from being alone and living in a small town (those could be both positive and negative). I wonder, is it worth it to touch on these topics, or is it better to keep everything simple. Stick to the visuals. I'm better at that anyway.
Of course, there are good things too. I should probably keep a list of positive things going, if only to lighten the atmosphere over here every once in awhile. I know this is a bit chaotic, but I've written variations of this post and ultimately deleted them on countless occasions over the last year or so. Blogging can be very personal, or very impersonal. Which do you prefer?